Almost 5!

On your last weekend before you turn 5, we have been to the circus, made pancakes, marshaled at your Parkrun, practiced your cycling, sung songs, been out for lunch and watched films. I am constantly amazed by how quickly my baby is growing up before my eyes. No longer a baby but a little person, grabbing hold of life with both hands and soaking it up. I love that your teddy is currently blindfolded so that you can arrange her surprise birthday party without her seeing. And that you thought your fishes may have been playing tag when one chased the other in the tank today. You are so kind and you always see the best in people (and fish).

My little girl is hurtling towards her 5th birthday bursting with new knowledge, wonderful friendships, more questions than you can imagine, determination, an exploding vocabulary, compassion, imagination, energy and so many dreams. At 4 years 11 months and 20-something days, you are my whole world. 

You have been the sweetest, funniest, kindest, most inquisitive little 4 year old and, whilst I am sad that this is the last time I'll write to you at 4, I cannot wait to meet my 5 year old daughter and see what adventures there are in store for her.

I love you, always x

"If you don't know where you are going any road can take you there" ~ Lewis Carroll, Alice in Wonderland

You're 4!

You have changed so much in this past year. From a squishy toddler into a beautiful, caring, inquisitive and thoughtful little girl with the apparent wisdom of someone far beyond her 4 years. 4, I can't believe you're 4! Although I am painfully aware that I'll be saying, I can't believe you're 14 before I know it so here's me, capturing our lives in letters so as to cherish each stage for ever. 

We went to Cambridge today to spend your birthday money. You chose a Mr Men book, a story about a boy who befriends a whale...

 ...a marble run game...

..,and a little bag of gemstones and a yo-yo. I can't pinpoint it exactly but a combination of the city, the season, the sunshine and you made me so very happy today. 

Sitting on the wall together by the little round church in Cambridge, we ate our jelly beans

In the lift in the car park today you, as you always do, clung to my leg in case the lift light went out and you wouldn't be able to find me, in the 2ft by 2ft space! I put my hand reassuringly on the side of your face holding you close to me, as if to try and stamp my protective instinct into you, like pushing a coin into clay, leaving an imprint forever. You must remember though, no single person should ever be your everything. That's not to say "don't love," just don't forget to be there for yourself. Look after yourself. Always know how to make yourself happy. Be considerate to others and never stop caring. If you can do this I know you'll be just fine. And then so will I. 

Have fun being 4 sweetie.

“She made herself stronger by fighting with the wind.” ~ Frances Hodgson Burnett, The Secret Garden

"Is that a real pyramint Mummy?"

"Do you mean pyramid? 

"No Mummy, you're saying it wrong"

"But it's called a pyramid"

"I know Mummy, that's what I said" ~ Me and you, just now watching Despicable Me

Dear Molly...you're 3 tomorrow

You were snuggled next to me in bed the other day watching Dora the Explorer and you just reached over to me without looking and put your hand on my arm for a while. That silent little show of affection meant the world to me. 

Tonight you tripped over your Lego box and hurt your knee. You were also tired so we had a big cuddle afterwards. I kept asking if you were happy now and you shook your little head solemnly. I think you knew Mummy wanted cuddles and it may delay bathtime a little to extend the period of trauma. I said it made me sad when you were not happy and through the sniffs and sad eyes you put your little hand on mine and patted it. Just letting me know you were ok really....but not quite ok enough to go to bed!

It was your 3rd birthday weekend this weekend and we had the most perfect party for you. All of our close friends and family came and everyone had a wonderful time singing and dancing with Mr Melody. You declared it was the best party EVER on numerous occasions and towards the end you said you'd had "the best day in my whole life Mummy." I welled up a little because that's your longest measure of time and it's still so short because you're so little. Mission accomplished anyway. I couldn't ask for much more than having created the best day in your whole life!

You used the word 'behold' the other day. At not quite 3! You pretended to blow a bubble through your hula hoop and said "Behold Mummy! The biggest bubble in the world!" My funny, clever, caring, sweet, chatty and sociable little baby has been here for 3 whole years and they've been the best 3 years ever.

Happy Birthday darling. I love you to the moon and back a million times. Mummy x