23 August 2014

A quite ordinary Saturday

My book made me think today. About time, with you. I want to freeze the passage of time. I won't though. I cant. Instead I follow you into the future. Collecting our memories from behind you. You're in too much of a hurry to preserve the moments. And I have the benefit of years to help me appreciate why we should. When I was little I had a carved wooden box full of my important things. I still have it, somewhere. Inside, a small plastic New Zealand tiki on a familiar piece of worn, old yellow string that my daddy gave me when I was little, my mummy's silver Saint Christopher, a plastic ring which matched one that my best friend had and other sundry items. They have no monetary value but those items are laden down with my childhood feelings. So precious. Always value what matters emotionally over everything else. Cherish the little things. 
When Mummy was little (c1978)

Right now, I'm curled up on the sofa. You've climbed in a Molly sized nook with my legs curled round you and you're resting your head on them. I write, and you sit. So peaceful. If I could bottle this moment...

I'm a bit sniffly with a cold and you hugged me because you thought I was crying. "You sound sad Mummy. Don't be sad." We had a nap together. It reminded me of when you were a baby and you'd fall asleep on my chest leaving a hot sweaty patch when you woke up. I felt very close to you. 
Poorly Mummy and sleepy Molly

Your nana and grandad had some sad news today. You heard me on the phone and asked what was wrong. I had a moment to decide whether to tackle the subject of death at your tender age. I did. I explained that Nana and Grandad's friend had died. You replied, "that is very sad news Mummy. I do hope they're ok." A response befitting an adult. You never cease to amaze me. Children's coping mechanisms are much better than ours, or than we give them credit for, and I remind myself of that daily.
Today you wanted to be Jessie

See you tomorrow sweetie. I love you.

"Promise me you'll always remember: You're braver than you believe, and stronger than you seem, and smarter than you think." ~ Christopher Robin to Winnie the Pooh, A A Milne

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